How are you nearly 2? How has it almost been 2 years since we met you but had to say goodbye so soon after. You should be your own little person now, with you personality shining through. You should be teaching and playing with your little brother and making us laugh and smile.
This week is baby loss awareness week and while I always think of you, this week makes me think about you that little bit extra. It is a week that we remember all those babies that have gone to soon like you. We think about you and all your little friends you are playing with now in the stars. We miss you all and long for you to be with us again.
It is crazy to think that 2 years has flown. While we are planning your 2nd Birthday, it’s not like it should be. We will always celebrate and do something special for your birthday but it’ll never be as it should.
We are also experiencing our second baby loss awareness week. A week that we never knew about until Mummy and Daddy became the 1 in 4. Parents who have to say goodbye far too soon to their babies.
A week that makes me want to talk about you so much more. To share your story, even though it’s a heartbreaking story. To help other parents who have lost feel like they are not alone. You existed, you were here with us and your story needs to be told. I don’t want people to feel scared to say your name to me. I love hearing people say your name. It makes me happy. People need to know it’s ok to talk about you.
Mummy has found the perfect way to celebrate your birthday this year. The Poppy run. A 5K in Leeds that we are going to do as part of your October Charity Challenge. Mummy, your little bro, Holly and Daddy are going to walk the 5k together. Making memories and remembering you. Wishing you were walking with us.
As I lay here in bed writing you this letter I just think about the 2 years of what ifs we should have had together. You’d have picked your favourite characters from your favourite shows. You’d be teaching your little brother everything you know.
How has it been 2 years since we said hello and goodbye to you in a flash. It’s not fair that you aren’t here.
Daddy misses you so much and I wish that I could see you again baby bear.
Always in my thoughts, forever in my heart.