Dear Poppy Bear
So your inquest starts tomorrow and it just makes me feel so sad. So sad that you aren’t here with us. Not here playing with you little brother and doggy. It’s been a long wait to get to this point sweetheart. How has it been 18 months since we had to say goodbye. All I have is picture of you, a picture of the times we had, the times we won’t have. Some people can say you are in a better place but a better place is here with Mummy and me. I just wish you were and that we were off on an adventure tomorrow.
Tomorrow is going to be so hard, going over in detail everything that happened to you. I think about what happened everyday, it can be for a second or for longer. It can make me cry and it can make me angry. Hearing what happened from other people is going to be hard. Mummy is being so so brave and going over her statement. Mummy is so incredible, I know you’d have been just like her. She is going to find it so hard but I’ll be there my darling. I promised you I’d look after her and I will Poppy. Always. She is so sad you aren’t here, sad she has to leave your little brother.
Speaking of Reuben, you sent us the best little brother. He is such a happy Chappy and we always tell him about you. He often looks at you pictures and smiles. He knows you’re his big sister and we’ll always tell him about his super star big sister.
I just can’t believe we are going to your inquest. I still can’t believe this has happened. We’ve had to prepare a media statement incase any press come. It is just crazy, how did we get here? I still find it so hard that you aren’t here with us. I feel that I let you down at times and that makes me even sadder. But I’m going to do you proud over the next 3 days darling. I’ll get Mummy through it for you. Getting her through it will get me through it.
In a way going over everything about you and your short time with us will make me feel so close to you. It’ll take me back to those 3 days together. Reignite the feelings in all the memories we had together. The feeling of holding you in my arms. The tiny grasp of your fingers. The softness of your hair. The lovely baby smell you had. How I wish you were here now with us. It makes me so sad you are never going to come home.
Miss you my little girl. Always in my thoughts. Forever in my heart.
All my Love Daddy xxxx